My 17 year old knows where he wants to go to college, but he doesn’t know what he wants to study. The other night, though, he made an important decision concerning his future.
He said, “I’m going to be Batman.”
I’ve heard that’s a difficult major. The “Leap From Tall Buildings Using A Tool From Your Utility Belt 101 Class” is a real killer.
And my 14 year old wants to be an alien when he grows up.
Like that’s a profession you can aspire to.
But I could use a super hero in the family. After all, these are dangerous, perilous times. I know this because the other day I got a huge gash in my thumb. Okay, not a huge gash. More like a slit. A deep slit. Well, more like a shallow slit. But it still bled. Lots. Um, a little. But it was dangerous. And perilous. Because what if I got some of that flesh eating bacteria under my skin?
And since I sliced open my thumb, it’s nearly impossible to do the dishes. And make dinner. And clean the house. That’s why I haven’t done any of those things, lately.
But I can still blog, so I’m hanging in there, despite my trials.
And do you want to know how I cut my thumb? I sliced it on a little piece of foil that was still attached to the top of an empty plastic can that I was cleaning. That’s right. I cut my thumb while I was washing garbage.
So, why was I washing the trash? Well, we have to clean all the leftover food out of our empty cans and bottles before we can recycle them.
I like helping the planet and all, but it’s bad enough I have to wash the dishes. And the laundry. And my hair. Now, I have to wash out the garbage so that I can throw it away. In a container that looks suspiciously similar to the one we throw the non-recyclable garbage into.
And since my idea of cooking is to open a lot of cans, I have a lot of cans to wash. I clean them all out by hand, too, because putting them in the dishwasher would be too easy silly.
But I have cut back on the number of cans I’ve been using by cooking more from scratch. Not really. Actually, I’ve started buying food in jars, rather than cans, because our recycling center doesn’t take glass. I get to throw glass jars away. Without washing them.
And my sister tells me that glass gets ground up in the ocean and becomes little sparkling pieces of sand. So, that’s good for the planet, right? Who wouldn’t want beach sand to have a little sparkle (that you could potentially cut your feet on)?
It’s either that, or I keep slicing my fingers while cleaning the dangerous, perilous garbage.
Maybe my son can save me once he becomes Batman.
Isn’t that the job of all crime fighters? To rid the city of thugs, villains, and leftover food particles?
He can start by washing that aluminum can.
I also try to recycle, but as I was washing my empty cans, milk cartons, etc. (I did not cut myself thankfully) I was thinking. I’m wasting water and are we not suppose to be saving it? Are we saving the planet or making things worse? I just don’t know what to do.
Oh thats so tragic I hate washing out trash it is so very pointless I dont like doing it so I think we should’nt have to do it!!
This post makes me really wish I had a sidebar that naturally updated itself so that I’d never miss a single thing you write. Because you are a crazy lady. With crazy children.
Oh yeah, I’m all for speeding up the end of the world by dumping my dirty cans in the real trash. Global warming? Bring it, baby.
Um. I am such a fan of randomness. Therefore you just got a new fan.
Hi.
Claudia,
Just buy more glass, like me. Then, you don’t have to waste water by washing your trash or feel guilty about throwing it out. Plus, the sand, it will sparkle.
Miss 12 year old,
I won’t make you wash the trash, but you still have to wash the dishes.
Annie,
I agree. I wish my sidebar showed when a post updated, too. I find myself checking every link in my blogroll every day.
Carolyn,
Whether you are a fan of randomness, or just a fan, you are welcome here!
Oh, yes, I’ve lived this particular dream. And I lived it in Seattle, where they take the whole “save the planet” thing rather seriously. We had to sort our recyclables to within an inch of their lives, and they all had to be pristine. My garbage was cleaner than my children, for crying out loud!
And thanks for dropping by my blog! Surely you know I wasn’t referring to YOUR children in Eternal Truth #1! Goodness, no! I’m so glad I got the chance to clear that up!
Cut story –sorry about the sliced finger. Those can hurt like a son of a gun. I found your Blog while visiting DeNae so I am just making a random visit. I think BatMan is a worthy profession!!! My grandson wants to either be a Scientist or Army guy cause they both help people. So noble. I –well, I am still trying to find out what I want to be when I grow up. Stick to the glass girl —I am all for the “sparkly” things in the sand. WASHING YOUR CANS–you are devoted recycler for sure!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! come visit my blog
Yeah, I’m an apostate recycler. I refuse to wash my garbage, and jars are more expensive. But I’m all over the Batman thing. If your son becomes Batman,we probably won’t need to worry about recycling any more, because he can save the planet!
Gosh, I’m just glad I don’t have to even decide to recycle. Trash is good and we have plenty.
For the record, I am a bit of an environmentalist because I want my kids to have clean air to breath, clean water to drink, and safe food to eat. That said, I still hate washing the garbage.