Yesterday, as I sat in the kitchen savoring a spoonful of chocolate chip cookie dough made by my 14 year old son, I realized something amazing.
I am an excellent mother.
Okay, sure. My teenage boys enjoy punching each other for fun. And they leave their clothes all over the family room. And their bedrooms have been condemned by the health department. And you have to wear a hazmat suit to enter their bathroom. But still.
I am an excellent mother.
Why? Because all my boys know how to bake chocolate chip cookies.
When my 14 year old came home from school yesterday, the first words out of his mouth were, “Can I make cookies?” I don’t know whether this is normal behavior for a teenage boy, but normal is overrated, anyway.
I mean, if making cookies is wrong, well, we don’t want to be right.
The truth is, my boys are genetically predisposed to bake. They have the blood of bakers coursing through their veins.
Which, some people might argue, is better than the blood of a vampire, because rather than suck other peoples’ blood, they bake stuff.
Like chocolate chip cookies.
And pie.
That’s right. Pie. While my boys enjoy baking cookies, my husband’s specialty is pie.
In fact, when we were dating, my soon-to-be husband made me a pie for my birthday. And then we got married. And every year for Thanksgiving my husband makes pies. Dream pies. And, 18 years later, we are still married. Coincidence? I think not.
But wait. While my boys bake chocolate chip cookies and my husband makes pie, my father-in-law bakes croissants and cinnamon rolls. The. best. you. have. ever. tasted.
And it goes back even further. My father-in-law’s father owned a bakery. And his father’s father owned a bakery. I told you. Bakers’ blood. You didn’t know there was such a condition, did you?
But the most significant consequence of the bakers’ gene is that teenage girls literally swoon when they find out my boys bake cookies.
I mean, all things being equal, which boy would you want to date? The handsome, immortal vampire who is only attracted to you because of your blood type, or the one who can bake cookies?
Okay. Many girls would choose the vampire. But say he already has a girlfriend. Then, who would you date? That’s right. The one who can bake cookies!
So, you see, the motherhood of the year award, I have it.
Just please don’t look in the bathroom.
I’d take the cookie baker over the vampire
Sounds like you are a good mum, well done.
Mal
I think my 11 year old son has this same baking gene, because Saturday at 10pm he said, out of the blue, “I want to make chocolate chip cookies” I’m very proud.