What is better than overeating, spending time with family, and hours of kitchen clean-up? Bowling, of course. That’s what we did for Thanksgiving.
I know what you are thinking. Only pathetic losers with nowhere to go and nothing better to do go bowling on Thanksgiving. But that’s not true.
Losers aren’t people who bowl on Thanksgiving. Losers are people who bowl on Thanksgiving with an eight lb. ball, don’t score over 90, and then fake an arm injury to excuse their low score.
Losers also score lower than their eight year old daughter, their 12 year old daughter, and all three of their teenage sons.
Losers also use words like “people” and “their” when they really mean “I stink at bowling.”
But before you all panic, thinking that I might have missed the traditional turkey and pumpkin pie, and that I might somehow escape from putting on another ten pounds like the rest of you, let me assure you that you don’t have to worry. I ate enough Thanksgiving dinner to gain 20 pounds, just a day early. My family celebrated Thanksgiving on Wednesday because my sister had to fly back home on Thursday.
And, for the record, bowling is apparently a popular activity on Thanksgiving. There were certainly lots of people at the bowling alley. And none of them were losers, either, since they all scored higher than I did.
And, after we went bowling we drove around looking for a restaurant to eat at, but, while bowling is a popular Thanksgiving activity, eating out is not, because just about every restaurant was closed. IHOP, though, was still open. We were about to go in and enjoy the traditional Thanksgiving pancake, but we realized it closed in just ten minutes (it was almost 8 o’clock) so we left.
Instead, we went home and had leftover turkey, stuffing, potatoes, rolls, and pumpkin pie. It was just as good as the day before. So I ate plenty, just in case I hadn’t gained that 20 lbs yet.
Because weight loss, well, that really is for losers.
We bowl on the Wii and I still suck at it. My last Wii score? 57. You are not a loser.
Annie’s not lying. As her sister, I can say that she is a terrible bowler. I took her with me on a date once when the guy wanted to go bowling.
She was the comic relief. And she made me look good (which I’m not).
And I have to say, bowling on Thanksgiving doesn’t sound half bad!
Hee hee. I thought I’d come over here and comment so you wouldn’t have to rely on the spammers of the world to brighten your day.
But I see you’ve got Annie and Jen so you’re fine.
WAIT a MINUTE! Are you a sister too? Cause you’re kinda hiliarous like them. You should have more comments for all that hilarity. Those loser bowling stories shouldn’t be wasted on spammers.
Let’s go toilet paper David Santos’ blog. And then we’ll go toilet paper Annie’s Relief Society President’s blog.
So I’ve always wanted to know. How is Thanksgiving on Wednesday? It couldn’t be as fun, right? Cuz then you have to wait another day of Black Friday.